Betrayal of Trust

Have you ever trust someone only to find that they betrayed you and also back-stab you. I read an article at this blog by sharlydia and that triggered something in me. I treat my friends well and when I trust them, I trust them. Even though I am not the kind who confide everyone openly about my matters, in fact I am a rather private person in that way on the contrary of me being a rather LOUD person (or so I was told) Anyhow, I have a good friend whom I was working with, we became fast friends and he was a rather crude person. A lot of people does not like him due to his quick mouth and his crude/rudeness. I use to make excuses for him all the time, and I always say this to other people who wonders why I hang out with him. I tell them if you look beyond the surface of crudeness he is actually quite a nice person and a good friend. Some people still do not understand why I bother defending him. I introduce him to my group of friends and today he hangs out with them. I have been known to have a big heart to forgive people

I have been recently having some rough times with my no longer current relationship. I found out from another close friend whom we all work together. Oh dear, this is going to be a little confusing. I have 2 good friends working together with me. Mr. Betrayal A and Friend B had a fight which almost resulted in physical fighting so he was complaining to me and I defended Mr. Betrayal A, which then Friend B told me off by saying WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? Here you are defending him and there he is stabbing you on the back. He didn’t dare to tell me initially so that I won’t get upset but then in the end he cpuldn’t hold it in and told me off. I was bery SURPRISED, especially since he’s like I am there for you when you are having difficulties and behind me he’s bitching bout me!

Well, lesson here is… you can’t really trust someone too much? Or is it me who is NOT SO WISE in judging people?

So to my other GOOD/BEST friends, who are reading this, please bear with me when I don’t share my matters with you, but I always will eventually tell. And thank you for never pressuring me to share until I am ready to…

Bestest Friends?

We all have in our lives at least one or more good friends and perhaps one or more best friends? I have been shot down by my friends about this. I have more than one BEST friend. Is that a crime?

Ok here is how it goes… over the years as you are growing up and going through different phases in life, high school, college, universities, first job, 2nd job etc… you meet new people along the way whom you befriends with that you get along really well. It could be due to the same work you guys do, or maybe you went through something which brought you guys closer.

So I have a best friend from high school, then 2 girls whom I was really close to in college. Then I went to Melbourne for 4 years and became really close to this other girl. When I came back I met back another old school friend, whom then I became really close with. Some of these people I do not hang out with on a regular basis but I can tell you at anytime if we call each other out for coffee and we can sit down and have a really good chat. I also have BEST FRIENDS whom I hang out with every week, go partying with... Then when you are at work, you will find yourself getting close to different group of people, and I being the bestfriend slut have a OFFICE bestfriend.

So I have like a list of BEST FRIENDs whom people tells me that it’s “BEST” so there can only be one. But I got a office bestfriend, Uni bestfriend, college bestfriend etc... Can someone please share my sentiments and I have further explain to my friends? :)

Moving On, Starting over

Have anyone of you ever shared your life with someone for many many years only to find out that perhaps he/she is not the right person for you. However, by the very many years, in different situation you have obligations. Perhaps some of you are married, some with kids, some dated for a long time, some engaged perhaps, but whatever the reason you have been together for so long, how do you just walk away over night and expect everything to be the same?

I had so many friends with different incidents. There was a couple who was dating for 7 years, got married and got divorce 2 years later. Another couple who dated for 9 years then broke-off (we all thought they were going to get married!). Another couple I know of, who has been dating for years, they trust each other, the girl swears by the bf never cheating on her, only to catch him red-handed one day. One last one is my friend who dated the same girl for 13 years, married and have a kid and yet they got divorced. So how do you this is the RIGHT PERSON for you and whatever you have is FOREVER?

So back to my post title, how does one moves on and start all over again. What happens to the routines that you've been doing for years? What happens to each other families and their routines? What about the pillow you are so used to sleep on in your other half's house? What about the place that you always go to eat together at? Do you not go there anymore? What about the things you shared and bought together? What about what abouts? Back to my posting a while ago, where is my book of answers?

So moving on and starting over, you need to pick up the pieces, put it back together and learn to take your baby steps all over again down the new path. So if when you stumble and fall, you have pick yourself up again.

So right now I am picking up all the pieces and putting them together again and then start all over again right at the starting line.

Met, Mingled and Still Single...

I had an interesting outing 2 nights ago. One of my colleagues invited us to one of these events he came across "Meet, Mingle & Match" It was one of those event where all singles get to go and meet new people. It was my first time coming across something like that and since he pre-registered us, so a few of us decided to go with it. Please take note that some of us weren't "Single"

Got there quite late... we were offered name tags,(in sticker form). Which I refused. So 1 out of 5 of us decide to entertain the organizers and took one.(which he didn't display). We sat down, the boys walked out to smoke and left me and another girl behind and the moment they walked off some guy walked over and sat down. It felt like the speed dating(Sex & and the City) for a minute there, introduce himself, and I guessed his profession on one guess. Accountant! He says to me "Wow, do you have a high IQ or something?" Somebody PUH-LEASE save me! His face and overall appearance shouts "I am an accountant!" Sorry no offense to any accountants out there.

Then came another guy whom I think is confused, "Look dude, having an accent isn't exactly going to turn me on, but Aussie and Scottish?" I think he was trying to impress or maybe trying to be funny, I am not sure. There were many very different characters and it is almost funny and interesting observing other people. Could have observe more if I didn't have people yabbering at me. My friend took a shot at chatting up a German girl, dunno what came out of that, maybe next time I have something else to post up on this :)

Does this really work? I am trying to keep an open mind here. Anyway, my friends and I kept together, sat by ourselves and we all went home, by ourselves. So we've met, sort of mingled and DEFINITELY still single. I rest my case...

Can Broken Be Mended?

I have met a lot of people who have troubled relationships. Some survived from it and live happily ever after and some just don't make it to the end. So really, if your relationship is broken or damage can it be mended? Will it be alright after?

Sometimes, when a couple is in a troubled relationship and they are still in it trying to fix it and salvage the relationship for a long time, they live around the trouble, but is this worth it? A relationship based on problems. But having said there I know of couples who survives and come out stronger.

There are also those that just live through the trouble and it eventually kills off the relationship. I feel really sad seeing this as it drains so much energy from both parties and it doesn't work out eventually.

One of my friend have been together with this guy for quite a long time and they broke off due to one party cheating. It was resolved and they got back together eventually, so they fixed it right? But NO... it wasn't resolve because, the other party even though they got back together cannot make peace with the issue. So it keeps propping up and in the end resulting in them breaking-up for good. But I suppose they TRIED to salvage whatever's left of "love" in their relationship which here didn't work out after all.

The other thing also, it requires both parties to work on it. If one party is not willing or not longer want to work on it, I think its the end. Or what if someone fell out of love... I suppose that's the last straw isnt' it?

So how do you really know whether your troubled relationship can be mended? Maybe its better to walk away from it before it too late, instead of spending so much time and energy to finally lose in the end.

So here's the summary I make of

1. Trouble, survive, result STRONGER relationship
2. Trouble, fix it, doesn't resolve, but live with it
3. Trouble, fix it, doesn't resolve, break-up
4. Trouble, fix it, doesn't resolve, break-up, patch-up, break-up eventually
5. Trouble, live through it, kills slowly, good-bye...

So CAN BROKEN BE MENDED?

My FIRST Poetic Moment...

Ever since I started my blog (to be honest, which was not that very long ago) I suddenly find a side of me that I have never know. I find it rather therapeutic, I get to say what I want and I get to express myself. It also makes me more conscious of my writing(spelling and grammar too!) and more recently I actually FELT poetic! So please forgive me if my first attempt at being poetic if it doesn't turn out so well. But well, cut some slack for your new fellow blogger's first attempt at being poetic. Hope you enjoy this below...

In Need of a Title

He greets me with a morning kiss,
So eager am I to see him,
Off we go to an adventure,
We seek for so long

He smiles at me,
Smile at me with his eyes,
So deep is his smile,
I almost get teary looking at him

As we arrive,
The sun was beaming at us,
Alas, the weather has changed to dark skiesh,
But it doesn't change how I feel

On the bed we lie,
Watching the rain fall,
My head on his shoulders,
His arms around me, my hands on his chest

As the rain trickle down the roof,
The gentle breeze blowing in our faces,
Our eyes shutting off,
Bout to go dreamland somewhere far away together

As I awoke still lying on his shoulders,
I can hear his gentle snore,
His face so sweet,
Not realizing I am staring, while he's asleep

Never wanting this moment to end,
I do not wake him up
and continue to watch my dear sleeping
Looking so peaceful

He winks at me,
So cheeky he is which gives tugs my heart,
Don't think he realizes it,
Oh heart, pls don't stop for a moment, I can't take it


If only he knew how he affects me sometimes,
This I don't tell him,
And how I want to pinch him sometimes,
But I don't mean bad, this he knows, I think...


As we set off for our journey home,
My heart is heavy,
Not wanting this to ever end,
Our escape from reality is ending

I miss him right the moment before I go to bed,
I see him in my dreams,
I think of him first thing when I wake up,
My dear, I miss you every moment I am not with you

So if you will hear me out,
Make some space for me,
Space in your heart I have yet to earn,
I promise I won't break it...

I was inspired to write this, so please do give me your comments and constructive criticism. And please give me some suggestions for a title for my first poetic attempt.

Book of "Answers to Life"

I have this friend whom I was VERY VERY CLOSE with, he was like the brother I never had. Let me give you a bit of our background. We went to university together overseas both of us from different countries and he was the first few people I be-friended there. We are VERY DIFFERENT but we got along somehow. Different in characters and interests.

Anyway, I use to ask him all the silliest questions which I know he doesn't have the answer to but I still have to ask. I like many other people would like to either "HAVE" the answers to life or I think, (I could be wrong about this) but like to seek the approval of other people or at least what they think. Use to ask him what is the right thing to do or decide on... So I always tell him this, I wish there is a book of "Answer to Life" where I can flip to the exact page where it tells me EXACTLY what to do so I don't make the wrong decision. Of course the added point would be, if you pick decision A, these are the consequences of your decision. So you would know.

I suppose this is all part and parcel of growing up.(We still are growing up all the time no matter what age we are!) I have attached a quote (2nd quote) from Grey's Anatomy below this blog. We pick the wrong boys/girls to date, we wrong courses to study(have I got a lot to say bout this), wrong route to take in a traffic jam, wrong dinner place to choose and the list is endless. And a lot of these decisions we make has a ripple effect and it affects the next thing that happens.
But sometimes when I think back, certain "WRONG" decisions which I have made, given the chance to do it again I will, cause I would never have learnt my lesson any other way. So my other question which I like to ask people is, "If you could turn back time, what would be the one thing/things you would change?" Alright, maybe I should leave this for another posting. :)

So please share with me, how do you make your decisions?

Quotes from Grey's Anatomy (Meredith Grey)

At some point, you have to make a decision. Boundaries don't keep other people out. They fence you in. Life is messy. That's how we're made. So, you can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them. But there are some lines... that are way too dangerous to cross.

"I've heard that it’s possible to grow up, I've just never met anyone who’s actually done it. Without parents to defy, we break the rules we make for ourselves. We throw tantrums when things don’t go our way. We whisper secrets with our best friend, in the dark. We look for comfort where we can find it. And we hope against all logic, against all experience, like children, we never give up hope."

MoRoNs and lifts...

I think more than a few people can relate to this matter. I work in a building where I park at the underground parking and I work at the highest, or rather the 2nd highest floor and the MOST annoying thing is... when you are in a hurry or really late for an appointment or late to see "the boss", for some strange REASON that's when people get into the lift between the floors underground parking and my floor.

THE WORST kinds are where they get into the lift in between the floors AND it's only to go up one floor. Get out of my way! I can see some of you nodding to my post so far? Lol... I have also experience those where they press the wrong floors, come on buddy... surely you know where you are going already when you entered the lift.

There are also those where they run towards the lift get in and hang on the the "OPEN DOOR" button to wait for their friends to board the lift and their companions would MOST LIKELY be slowly strolling or leisurely walking in. Well, HELLO! Do we ALL have to wait for your friends too?

Last but not least are those who LEAN against the buttons. There is THREE other panels in the lift without the buttons, can't you at least lean there instead of leaning and accidentally pressing all the floors.

I rest my case. Pls do share your thoughts with me.

First Kiss...

I have had this conversation with several people and so exactly when is it acceptable to have the first kiss with the particular girl or guy? First date? Third date?

I had a friend once who was going out with this guy and I believe after the 3rd or 4th date he attempted to kiss her when sending her home, she gave a big reaction by shouting "NO", with both her hands up and leaned back towards the door on the passenger seat side. It doesn't seem so funny when I am telling you here, but it was very hillarious when she was telling me WITH the actions included.

My two cents worth, if you are already friends with the person prior to the date/dates and you guys got the connection and all the chemistry works, first date seems pretty reasonable, but then again you will meet those aggressive ones who will attempt everything... LOL. However, in general, new people, dating, first date is a NO NO for me. Probably AT LEAST third date, depending on the progression of the "relationship" :) Well, do let me know what you "think" or experience :)

VirGin BLoGGeR...

Pls welcome me the virgin blogger into the blogging world. I just realize there are more bloogers around me than I realize :) At the moment, I prefer to remain anonymous, in case I do really get into this and might write something offensive or something "secretive" about someone. Now that would make it more interesting won't it.

I am bursting with stories, view and opinions and I can't wait to put it all down. This is going to be exciting and you are all going to hear from me soon enough. For now, I need to go as I am sneaking in some time to do this during office hours. Actually, technically now it's over my office hours, but where I work and in my industry office hours is 24/7.

Virgin as the Virgin Blogger Can Be...